Healing a Heartbreak
How It Works
Heartbreaks are one of life's hardest teachers. As you grieve the loss, try to keep things in perspective and practice lots of affirming self-care to remind yourself that you are worthy of love.
When you're ready to begin processing this on a spiritual level, here's a series of questions I wrote to help me reflect on the pain of a heartbreak some years ago:
1. Who, what, or where is the teacher in my life right now?
There's always a lesson happening in our lives, but we have to want to see it and learn it. Perhaps the lesson is in your husband, or your job, or, like me, where you live; when you find the lesson, you're ready to ask …
2. Am I truly ready to forgive this piece of me that is unhealed?
I knew for a fact that after my breakup, forgiving both myself and my ex-boyfriend would be a long process. I trusted my heart when it said, “No, I'm not ready to forgive. You need to keep feeling this pain. When it’s time to let go, you'll know.” Sometimes we're not in a practical circumstance to treat emotional pain! Sometimes to keep functioning on a daily basis, we need to hold off on addressing the pain. But you'll always know when it’s time to take a deep breath and let go, so you can move on to …
3. What is the next layer within me that's not healed?
Just like peeling an onion, once you uncover something and have truly let go of it, you can move down to the next layer. We're all coated with experiences that have caused pain in our lives, and I know very few people who have completely healed from everything that’s happened to them.
4. How do I actually forgive and let go?
Again, this will look different for everyone — but I will guarantee there's a common thread: love and compassion. One of my mantras for the last several years has been, “There is a place inside of me where only love exists,” and when I meditate, I reach deep into that place to connect with the love and compassion from which we are all created. The same love and compassion unites us, and we can access it at any time to practice forgiveness. It takes work, but it's truly beautiful and liberating when it comes together!
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